Blages

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Medusa's Media Gets The Whiplash- About Time


Okay. Here's an opener- before you all jump boat, ship, hut or mansion, I’m with the media, been with the media, and the absence if its been felt has been a premeditated one. Like a snake, writers often need to shed, peel or skin off that old worn out bloodied and badgered outfit and get into a brand new get up so that the juices can kick in again, just Google Hunter S Thompson- the Good Gonzo Doctor himself and his tireless pursuit of and utter destruction of that Writer's Rut..
So before naysayers, who in this peculiar case constitutes the so called media fraternity, comes to any conclusion, lemme rest your diseased cells, sickened minds and pronounce right upfront that I still write- and that being IN the media DOES NOT necessarily constitute any relationship with the art and craft of writing; a requirement seldom practiced and a circus that's increasingly becoming an unnecessary limb protruding rather profusely daily, biweekly and so on and so forth.
First up here’s the fist: there’s no such thing as a media fraternity. There are people doing the same shit but that does not qualify it as a fraternity.
Insecurity and jealousy rules the roost that shelters or protects the chickens that hide in there shooting bullets over a so-called colleague's abused shoulder.

Secondly there is NO MEDIA. So forget the media fraternity part, media itself is a ghost like Phantom and Phantom the Comic Caper definitely carries more credibility than the charade that parades itself as the MEDIA.

And now the final revelation: the so called MEDIA we have is a Make-Over; an eye wash lashing at the public in the guise of being a sensible and responsible communicator and using self-serving terms such as THE FOURTH ESTATE and turning those venerable words into diseased clichés.

In a word, the MEDIA is a JOKE that isn't funny and those running and manning these so called MEDIA HOUSES are both the MASTERS of the CIRCUS and the JOKERS parading in them trying to entice serious laughter. But here’s the thing: THEY CHARGE YOU AN ENTRANCE FEE TO COME SEE THAT FARCE and then expect you to RESPECT and SUPPORT that ACT.

And behind the scenes, silhouetted in dark shades or looking every inch the credible and hard working underpaid and malnourished stressed-out pussycat is the goddamn SENIOR CITIZEN of the MEDIUM; clad in a grimy gho and spectacles that do NOT break! How Apt; The Spectacle!

I know a few. And in a case or two, I owe them ASSAULTS.

The media we have is a MEDUSA’S HEAD. You know when the MOIC inaugurated the MEDIA AWARDS, a well intentioned but misguided effort now thankfully discontinued along with the frenzy with which it was first inaugurated- happy winners applauding it and sore losers decrying the unfairness.
On its second outing, they gave the best feature/investigative award to a pothead for doing a story on cannabis in a village full of poor and innocent villagers trying to make a quick buck- you could not, in all your conscience, begrudge them that.
The villagers went to jail and the pothead came back with a few grams of the fresh hashish and that crowning jewel on the crown they dubbed "BEST GNH STORY!"
The MEDUSA’S many heads and limbs dangling hither and dither has now gotten advanced cancer and the cancer is cannibalistic – it’d eat its own genitals if it could but bend down and stretch out enough to get down to that prick and choke it down, nerve by nervous nerve, grind by uncouth grind, till the very thing splits open the shallow throat and comes falling down in that bottomless belly of greed, myopia, shallowness, insecurity, callousness, power plays, envy, selfishness, discontent, and duping the same reader over and over again with a change in the header here, a conclusion in the kicker there but all with the predictable conclusion.

But as we say, it’s in BLACK & WHITE and there’s no escaping that fundamental realty – probably the best thing going for the so-called MEDIUM.

Well, the jig is up you jumping fleas, for I’m here, naked and raw as a newborn bastard, ready to throw up the hypocrisies you all fed me disguised as wholesome wheat.
The medium is sick. That sickness ails the so-called media maestros and the houses of deception and corruption they continue to built.

Here are a few tips:

If the medium (I’m not gonna dignify the M****RF*****S) is sick, why can’t they get the proper treatment?
If it’s a loss-making venture, how come the numbers keep piling up?
If its about some misguided sense of patriotism gone wrong, don’t worry, let someone who has the heart, the head and the pockets to back the causes pick up the mantle and the bill.
After all, this is not a nation deprived of real people with real professionalism and passion.

The MOIC was right in trying to frame an Ad Policy via Circulation and other measureless measurables, such as Circulation. Most houses print less than a quarter of the amount they are required to under legal and ethical provisions. They inflate the numbers on paper; in reality, so-called national newspapers don’t even make it out of the Capital. If they do, you can practically count the number of newspapers distributed nation-wide on your ten fingers. Forget your toes, thankfully there's no need to bend over to get a proper count.
It’s just that much.

Now here’s the Dessert: They get an equal amount of the RGOB Ad Pie!!! BINGO!!!

This piece is poisoning my own peace… so really, I’ll continue the EX-PO-SE as I've experienced it on another night… but for now, my fellow DRUKPAS of this BLESSED LAND, beware the stuff you read, for they come soiled and stained, and investigate whenever you hear stuff like CREDIBILITY, HONOR, OBJECTIVITY, FAIR, FORTHRIGHT, PUBLIC SERVICE and the like emanating from the MEDUSA'S many mouths. But there's good news too... the RGoB now has done what it should have- looked at Media Houses and realized they ain't never gonna grow up, and hence stopped the Spoon-Feeding. Now let's see how it does cope with Growing Up, or NOT as might be the case along with Righteous Claims of the Fourth Estate going down under and dragging with it DEMOCRACY itself.
Its just so predictable... And kudos to MoIC and MoF for doing what needed to be done- taken out the whiplash, for I'd rather read a good paper or two rather than have a quantity of nonsensical chaos parading as responsible newspapers and the harbingers of truth.
For Now, Its a Jolly Good Night!


PS: YourLustForLifeStartsRightNow!